Back?? or just evolving with life…
I have to laugh some, or maybe a lot, at my last post in November of 2013 titled “Back”. I had NO idea what “back” was really going to be like with three kids. Things have been rewarding, challenging, nutso, and full of growth- both in how our family works and my own view of my career. As in, the lines are now quite blurred between life and career, I can hardly see where one begins and one ends. Everything continues to become more and more integrated.
To begin back in 2013, my post “Back” was actually to be the last time I was in my studio for awhile. I had no idea now little creative energy I realistically had at the time and how much energy I would really need towards the kids. We went through a rough time with my teenager, alongside having a 2.5yr old and a newborn. I would often joke that I didn’t know which kid I was losing the most sleep over! What it really amounted to, was I was losing sleep over every one of them, and therefore, not sleeping at all most of the time.
During this time I had this nagging idea over and over again for a clothing item for nursing moms. I was struggling with a particular aspect of my wardrobe and couldn’t shake the idea that this particular item needed to exist. Well, really, my exhausted self wanted to purchase it, but couldn’t find it anywhere. SO… after much thought, designing, and prototyping, my little company AVOLIA has been born. It’s still not up and running as I am currently working with a local manufacturer towards a manufacturing prototype (as opposed to working with a seamstress like I was previously). But you can see where my creative mind has been these days. It’s been great intellectually as I have been climbing a steep learning curve. Sometimes overwhelmingly steep. I find myself thinking sometimes that if I knew now much work it would really be, I probably wouldn’t have begun this project last year. But it’s too late to stop now- little by little (Sometimes frustratingly so very little) I keep moving forward.
Speaking of intellectual challenges. Our struggles with the teen has led me to homeschooling him. I can now add “teacher” and “educational guidance counselor” to the list of things I do :). It is such an enormous change that I have dedicated an entirely new blog to the process.
Things often feel like they are moving slowly, though I am juggling many things. Most days it feels like I’m running through quicksand and I can’t see what I have accomplished until I have the time to look back. It has been an eventful year- raising three kids, starting a company and homeschooling. I have moments where I long to just get into the studio and work creatively on something that doesn’t have a particular goal. Like art for art’s sake. That is my big undertaking for the next couple of months, to find the time to get back into the studio just to create. Create whatever, no goals, no end desires. I have enough of that in my life. I just want to play, really. I miss that more than anything.